Answers
by Rachebuga
Summary: Elisabeth (the unwanted child of Tris and Tobias) makes a trip to find the answers she's been waiting for her whole life about her biological father. But what if everything she thought she knew about him wasn't true? I don't own divergent. All rights to Veronica Roth. Rated T because I'm Paranoid.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Tris POV

It's been 9 years since the war. Only 3 of them I've been able to remember successfully. The 6 I cannot seem to understand, seemed to have been spent in simulation after simulation, and test after test. I know that erudite faked my death and kept me for their own selfish reasons but the effects of those six years, both mentally and physically, were ones I have yet to overcome completely.

As weird as it is to admit, Uriah is the only one who understands what I'm still going through after that. It's been almost a year since I saw him last. When we escaped he helped me back into the city, who somehow returned order back to the faction system. However, Uriah found the life he needed at the time, outside of the fence. Last I heard, he was teaching PE at a high school. A special high school with a secret program for children of those who escaped the factions. Apparently they offered a way for these children to come back to the city and become apart of the factions at a choosing ceremony. I don't know the details of the operation but I love Idea of giving the kids their own choice.

My life now is where I thought it would be 9 years ago during my initiation. Eating dauntless cake and spending my days helping Tobias train initiates or acting as ambassador and returning with him every night to a cozy little apartment we called our own. Zeke and Shauna being so happily married and Christina as crazy as ever dragging me around with her all the time.

Things were not exactly how I expected though. I never in my wildest dreams expects Christina to be the one to force me to do this. A white plastic stick the only thing between the finally normal life I always wanted and the revelation terrified ever fiber of my being.

It took me what seemed like hours to finally take the test and even longer to check the results.

My breath caught in my throat and I could feel wart spilling from my cheeks, but it didn't fill like me. It wasn't me. I felt like I was watching someone else. Her knees shook before they finally gave in and the collapsed to the floor, her face falling in her lap. This couldn't be me. The woman falling to pieces in front of a dancing little plus sign on some cheap piece of plastic. How could this be me? When did I become so weak?

The one thing terrifying me more then results was the looming recognition that I was going to have to share the results with him.

Over the years Tobias and I had more then our fair share of problems. We struggled the most trying to pick up the pieces after my infamous return from "death" and we could never seem to free ourselves from our problems telling the truth. At one point out fighting got so out of hand Christina converted the guest room in her apartment to a room just for me. This particular string of fights ended with forgiveness and a wedding on a whim at 2 am.

Since that night we'd be the happiest we'd ever been. Settling into a routine and unpredictable life we both loved. The only problem is, there is no way Tobias will take this well. No way.

* * *

I stand outside the door to our apartment. My hands shake to much to open the door and my breaths come too fast. I try to control myself as I remember what Christina told me this morning.

"You need to tell him tonight. You can't go on with your life for weeks acting like nothing is going on. This is real and it's life changing and it deserves to be treated as such. Lying is the temporary solution to the permanent problem. The truth is going to come out eventually, you need to just tell him now." _Such a candor _I remember thinking as she kept talking about why is needed to tell him tonight.

I guess her words worked to some degree because I'm here now. Or maybe it was the fact that she made a trip to my boss earlier and when she returned I was no longer needed for a diplomatic trip to amity tonight.

My fingers closed around the door handle and I pushed it open using what felt like every ounce of muscle in my body.

"Hey Tobias, we need to talk," I said filling my voice with the strength and confidence I lacked on the inside. I closed the front door and gained control over my nerves just in time for him to come walking in from our bedroom, pulling a shirt on to cover his perfectly muscular torso.

"What are you doing here? I thought you were going to amity tonight?" He says, almost a little flustered as he crosses the room to me. His arms wrap around my waist and he pulls me into a hug. I can feel every breath and every heart beat of his. I don't want to leave. I want to stay like this forever and never face the truth, never have to see him as mad or scared as he was going to be when I gave him the news.

Disgust filled my stomach. I couldn't let him hold me like this when I knew I was about to ruin everything. I pulled out of the hug. He tightened his hip on my waist but I quickly pushed his hands off me. I took one step away from him keeping my eyes on the floor trying not to make eye contact.

"I backed out. I just really need to talk to you."

I started towards the couch keeping my eyes trained on the floor. His feet followed me cautiously as if he stepped to close I might explode in front of him and quite honestly I possibly could. My feet moved across the floor of the apartment,my mind making mental notes of every crack it came to. Just before I reached the couch my eyes caught glimpse of something a few feet to the side. A black t shirt, the kind the fell of the shoulders with lacy details. It was definitely made for a female but it was too big to be mine.

I didn't say anything just tried not to look at it as he sat beside on the couch, slightly turned so he can face me. I can't ask him about it I'm just going to have to trust him for now because we have much more pressing issues to deal with.

I felt his hand take mine rubbing gentle circles with his thumb. "Talk to me then," the words almost sounding like a question as they entered my ears.

I pulled my hand from his grasp and covered my face. "Oh Tobias, please don't be mad," I said finally lifting my face from my hands. Our eyes meet for the first time. His eyes are full of worry and hurt and they seem to rip me apart seeing into the very depth of my soul. I can't hold his gaze for long and I'm slightly relieved when I see movement behind him.

There she stands in the door way to his bedroom. Our bedroom. Wearing nothing but his shirt. Our eyes meet and she quickly ducks back into the bedroom.

Without a word I stand and leave slamming the door behind me. As soon as hear the slam behind me I ran my feet picking up. The speed wiping my tears for me. My mind finally given the space to fully think.

When I get to Christina's room my fists meet the door to fast and too hard. The noise ringing through the hallway. She pulls pulls me through the door and shuts it fast.

"Christina, can you get ahold of Uriah. I need to leave the city."

Christina's face reflects the shock I know I've just given her. She nods her head and pauses as if unsure she should share her thoughts.

"Under one condition. You tell me and uri everything as soon as we all get settled out there"

I noded. Slowly but surely the world returned to color and sound. I could hear the banging on Christina's door and a voice yelling my name so desperately.

* * *

We left 2 days later. Uriah found both me and Christina apartments a floor below his. I didn't expect Christina to come with me but I'm glad she is because I don't know if is be able to make it through this pregnancy without her.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Elisabeth's POV

**16 Years later**

I sat in the kitchen finishing my breakfast when I hear heavy footsteps. Uriah. I see him stumbling out of his bedroom.

"Good morning dad!" I say. I can't hold back the laugh that sends food spewing from my mouth as he trips on the rug in the living room.

"Good morning Lise," he said as he shamefully pulling himself up from the ground. I've almost always known Uriah wasn't my biological father but he's been a better father to me then that man ever was. I was adopted a little over 12 years ago when I was 3.

I've been told my father never wanted anything to do with me, leaving my mother to raise me on her own. However, my mother was torn to pieces by the ways I was exactly like him. When she finally couldn't handle it she decided to put me up for adoption. Uriah jumped at the chance. I was exactly the person he needed to fill the lonely hole he'd been feeling in his life. It worked out well for my mother too because this way she could still be apart of my life, but it doesn't hurt her the way it used to.

"Do you think they are awake?" He questions pulling me from my thoughts with a mischievous glance to the ground. I knew this meant he wanted to mess with Christina and Robert in the apartment below us.

"Is it noon yet?" The sarcasm obvious as I spoke. In some unspoken agreement we raced to dad's room. We climbed on his bed ready to jump to the floor directly over the place they slept. Dad's hand hovered the volume dial of the stereo next to his bed.

"On the count of 3. 1,2-"

"Wait," I said quickly cutting him off, "do we have any water balloons?"

The look on his face seems to say that I was a daughter he more than certainly could be proud of. He moves toward the kitchen pulling a box of little colorful rubber balloons. I followed closely behind. I pulled a rather large bucket out from beneath the sink. We filled the bucket until it almost overflowed, quickly, working as the perfect team. Dad would fill the balloons with the coldest water we could get, handing them to me to tie.

I set the bucket near the door before returning to dad's bedroom. We both positioned ourselves exactly as we had been before. When we got to 2 in the countdown, we turned the volume of the music up to the loudest setting. Finally when he reached one and we leaped from his bed landing at the same moment. The sound resembled that of a bomb and the way the floor shook backed it up perfectly.

When we reached the living room we each grabbed a few balloons and stood ready to strike. As if one que, Christina's high pitched angry squealing echoed down the hall.

"URIAH! ELISABETH!" She said in a voice that sent chills down my spine. Honestly, it could probably sour milk, it was so bad.

When she finally burst through our front door, the angry look on her face was quickly wiped of as a little pink water balloon hurtled toward her face, the balloon breaking as it made contact.

It didn't take long for us to use every water balloon there. Once all of them were used Christina stood dripping water into a puddle around her. We all struggled incredibly hard to contain our laughter. Even Robert, who joined the ambush as soon as he realized what happened, was holding his mouth hoping it'd stop the laughter.

"What were you thinking? I was trying to-" her voice load, controlled, angry and much scarier then the voice she used on her way here.

I stopped her from continuing, "Christina! Why are you yelling? People are sleeping! You could wake them!" I said mocking her tone. The other two lost control of their laughter. This only angered Chris further. There was practically steam coming out of her ears.

Trying to avoid her blow I ran to the bathroom grabbing a towel and then running to my room to grab the shorts and shirt she let me barrow the last time is spent the night at her place.

I emerged from my room handing them to her. She took them and went to the bathroom muttering, "thank you," through clenched teeth.

I waited till the bathroom door closed to let out the laughter if been holding on to for what seemed like forever. The only problem was that once I started laughing with the other two, there was no stopping.

* * *

A few hours later, the four of us say around the kitchen table talking and laughing like any other day.

Even dad couldn't help but laugh as we talked about that time when I was 13 when he broke his arm during a prank war with Tris.

"So everyone is coming for family dinner tomorrow. Whose place should we have it at this month?" Uriah asks obviously trying to change the subject. Although I guess we weren't all technically related, we had dinner together ever month because we were the closest thing to family any of us had ever experienced.

Although I hate to admit it I've become deprived of any interactions with anyone younger then 40 since Gavin left two falls ago. Gavin has been my best friend since I was 6 and he was 8. Him and his parents lived next door to Chris and Robert. We were both in a program at the school for children of faction refugees. That meant that when the choosing ceremony came, those of us of age could choose whether to stay outside the city or be thrust into the mysterious lives of the factions. When his time came he decided to leave and I haven't heard from him since.

"Well after your little stunt this morning. I think it should be you," Christina says, not even attempting to hide her attitude.

Dad seems to think it over before replying, "okay, but if you expect us to cook, you better start grocery shopping." Christina was reluctant but she finally accepted.

"Well looks like everything's all set. I'll go tell tris," I said heading for the door, hoping this time I could finally get more details about her and my dad and their life before me. A chorus of objections stops me from going any further.

"Lise, it's probably best if I talk to her. Today's a hard day for her," Christina says placing a hand on my shoulder. Everyone's mood seems to change faster then I think should be possible. In all the commotion this morning I'd forgotten today was the 16th anniversary of the day my pregnant mother left the life she knew, for me. How could I be so insensitive and waltz down there reminding her of what she who she left behind and act like it was _nothing_?

I guess I never quite understood why I reminded her so much of him. My pale skin, small frame, and blonde hair were exactly like hers. The only physical feature I seemed to share with him were piercing blue eyes and a kind smile. Do I act like him? Walk like him? Talk like him? I wish I could know what he's like. Find out why he didn't want me. What about him did my mom find so heartbreaking when she saw it in me?

"Can I meet my biological father?" The words spill from my mouth. I can't seem to take them back or regret them either. Wide eyes and confused faces stare back at me. Even Christina who's now returned from talking to tris can't seem to understand the words I've just said.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Family dinner didn't go how i'd expected. Tris took her time arriving and barley are anything during the time she was here. I don't think I heard her speak a full sentence the entire night.

Christina and Robert shared news that they were adopting a set of twins within the next month. That surprised everyone being that they were certainly not in the prime of their child rearing years, but we were all happy for them nonetheless. They'd wanted kids for years and I guess this was finally their chance. Susan seemed to be the most excited I guess her brother had wanted this more than the rest of is realized.

Caleb and Susan came bringing only their oldest son Thomas. It wasn't something new, Henry chose erudite at his choosing ceremony. Nobody was completely surprised he left abnegation except for me. Apparently Caleb had once chosen erudite but after the war when the factions were reestablished he stayed in abnegation to be with Susan.

Thomas brought a girl with him this week. Her name was Victoria and her and Thomas were engaged. I guess they must have really loved each other considering they are getting married at 19. Luckily however, their PDA was practically nonexistent.

My dad's brother, zeke, and his family stayed at our place that night after a lot of convincing by both me and dad. When we explained to him what we wanted he filled with excitement, probably of the idea of his brother back in dauntless, even if just for a week.

Once it all seems settled uri offers the last words, "I have one condition. No one can tell him. He has to figure it out himself."

"Of course dad! What makes you think I'd make this easy on him?"

Everyone laughs before heading to bed. I'm help zeke push his wife, shuana's, wheelchair into my room where they will be sleeping.

By the time I make it back to the living room, Zeke's son Ezra is already asleep on the couch.

I watch Ezra as he sleeps. I've always loved him, he was always like a little brother to me and I've always been his big sister. Like me, Ezra was adopted at a young age. I remember the night it happened, I was 8 and he was 4.

* * *

_Loud knocking came from the door to Tris' apartment. Uriah got the door and there stood Caleb clearly out of breath holding a little brunette boy._

_"Is zeke here yet?" Caleb says barley able to say the words between breaths. The boy looked scared, tears streamed down his face and he was visibly shaking._

_"No but I'll go check and see if he went to my place by accident." Dad says. Caleb nods and looks at the poor boy._

_"You go with him, Caleb. I'll take the child." Tris said moving to take the shaking child from his arms. She held him and I told him the stories they use to tell me when I was his age about Heros and happy endings. He stopped shaking soon enough._

_The boys returned with zeke this time._

_"Caleb can you tell me everything now?" Zeke asked once the front door closed._

_"As you probably understand being a faction leader brings a lot of secret responsibilities," Caleb said. Zeke nodded urging him to continue, so he does, "well this morning I was entrusted with a child. A sick child. His mother gave him to me this morning. The situation in his home meant she had to give him up to save him. She made me promise that Ezra would be adopted tonight and to a family outside of abnegation that would care for him."_

_Zeke and shuana were the perfect fit. They had wanted children more than anything but because shuana was paralyzed they were unable to. _

_"So that's it? He's my son now?" Zeke said the biggest smile crossing his face. _

_"Well I just need you to sign for the closed adoption which means you won't know who his birth parents are and they can't know who you are either" Caleb said in his voice that proved he'd once belonged in erudite. _

* * *

Light filled the room around me, prying my eyes open. It was only a matter of time until I'd been in the home of the brave. Face to face with the man that I made a coward.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4:

Dark hallways with blue scarcely marking the path. Inked skin and punctured bodies. Loud voices and carefree actions. Freedom practically written on the entire building. This must be dauntless.

Zeke pushed shuana on her wheelchair

Just a little ahead of us. My dad walks with them laughing at his own jokes. Ezra decided a piggy-back ride the best mode of transportation. I tried to keep up but failed as my senses took in ever aspect of this place. Dad stops dead in his tracks. We enter the open area that every hallway seems to lead to.

"This is the pit," Ezra says as if it was the most obvious thing ever.

"The pit? Reminds me of armpit. What a glamorous name," I laugh at the irony of a place that sounds so much like armpit being what seems like center of life here.

"Only the best name for the highlight of dauntless life," his words mirroring my thoughts.

Uriah sighs longingly beside me, "I almost forgot how much I loved it here."

Zeke and shuana turn to face us as shuana's asks, "so what do you think?" Her question pointed to me directly.

"It's amazing," I say with a sigh.

"Zeke! You're back! I was beginning to wonder when you didn't show up for the meeting this morning" a voice says from behind me. His voice strong and direct cutting through the noise in the pit. It sounds almost soothing and safe and oddly familiar.

"The legendary four? Worried? When did you get feelings man?" Zeke said jokingly. Ezra slides off my back and I turn to see where he goes. He moves toward the man I assume the voice belongs too. He's tall and has dark brown hair cut the same length as Caleb's. Abnegation short. His features are still finely chiseled although he seemed to be at least Zeke's age.

Ezra's knuckled bump with the mans as he says, "how was your trip?" His voice much kinder than before.

"Great," Ezra says not letting his smile leave his face.

The other guy looks back up his eyes stopping on dad. We both face him now.

"Uriah?"

"Last time I checked, yeah" dad says smirking. The two hug awkwardly.

"It's good to see you again!" He says to dad as his eyes wonder to me. They linger longer then I'm comfortable with. His eyes widen and his jaw visibly drops. Our eyes meet and for the first time I am able to see they are a deep piercing blue. A chill runs down my spine. From the outside I make sure I am composed but on the inside I'm everything but composed. His eyes are the color of the ocean. They are deep and full of years of carefully concealed pain. Those aren't the kind of eyes you see on just anyone. But I've seen them before. On me.

My stomach does a flip. I feel like a war between emotions is taking place inside of me. I'm angry because he wanted nothing to do with me and he left my mom to pick up the pieces. While at the same time I feel bad for him he lost the one person who truly loved him. I'm relieved as well that the reason tris gave me up was real. That he was real. I can't be angry at her for leaving me anymore. But most of all I'm scared. My biological father is standing right in front of me and he has the power to ruin everything about the life I've come to love and he could end up hurting my mom all over again.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5: Tobias POV

How could this be? She looks so much like much like my Tris. The Tris that was the first one to jump. Landing in a grey blur in the net, her laughter captivating my attention. The selfless 16 year old Tris that was willing to sacrifice her life for a brother that delivered her to her execution. _Stop. That is not Tris. _Her eyes were a dark blue color far from the grey I'd loved in Tris' eyes and she looked about 16. Much too you g to be her.

I feel the color leave my face. I've been staring at her way too long and I know it. However I can't seen to look away.

"What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost," she say sarcastically but something tells me she's hiding her feelings in sarcasm.

"Maybe because I feel like I've seen a ghost," I muttered under my breath. I couldn't let her see my weakness. She wasn't Tris. Tris was the one who knew Tobias. Not this girl.

"Call me Four," I said using the intimidating voice that belonged to that side of me. I held out my hand for her to shake. She took it, but reluctantly and she pulled away fast.

"This is my daughter," Uriah said. He seemed to contemplate continuing until her elbow hitting his arm made the decision for him.

"Call me Lise," she said. Her words kind and polite this time. Very abnegation like.

* * *

I've been dreading going to dinner all day. I've been struggling to push back the memories of Tris I'd be suppressing for years, to no avail. Everywhere I go I see her. I see her in the training room standing against the target waiting for my next knife. I see her in the pit or by the chasm. Everytime I pass the net or think about going through my fear landscape. I've spent the past 16 years doing everything I could to forget, or at least not think about it.

As much as I'd like to hide it Tris left my life empty and missing something and I kept myself busy filling the time so I wouldn't notice and nobody else would notice. How is it that Uriah can come back with his daughter and suddenly point out the flaws I'd been trying to cover. Now not even keeping busy can keep Tris from my mind.

I decided the best way to do this was to go to dinner early. Zeke or Uriah are never on time and so doubt Lise will be. That way I can finish fast and leave before I have to see too much of her.

The minute I sat down I started shoveling into my mouth. I'm not paying attention to anything but getting the food to my mouth.

"Hey Four." I turn to see Gavin taking a seat next to me.

Gavin was young, young enough to be one of our kids, but we'd all seemed to take a certain liking to him. Zeke and I trained him during his initiation year and he proved to be extremely impressive. He was a tough fighter, finishing third in stage one. However, his real strength showed through mentally. His times in the last 2 stages were incredibly fast and he only had 7 fears. He finished first in his initiation class and had amazing potential to be a leader. When it came down to it, though, it didn't matter whether we recruited him or not ambassador was what he wanted to be.

"Hey!" I said not knowing what else to say. I was much more disoriented then I realized.

"Have you seen Zeke?" He asked, his voice hinting that it was urgent. It was a matter of seconds before zeke walked up rolling shuana. He put her at the head of the table where she always sat before sitting down across from us.

"Hey Gavin! Good to see erudite didn't abduct you!" Zeke said with a smirk.

"Easy for you to say when they'd never want you," Gavin said smirking back. We all laughed lightly. When the laughing faded off Gavin lowered his voice before asking zeke, "how is she?"

Zeke glanced at me briefly before his eyes locked on something beyond me.

"Why don't you ask her yourself."

Gavin and I both follow his gaze to the entrance. There near the door stands Lise watching Ezra and his friends try to show off. Typical dauntless kids. I hear Gavin gasp as he moves to his feet.

"Lise?" He questions loud enough for her to hear across the room. He begins moving in her general direction. She turns and repeats his name. They both move toward each other until he gets close enough to pull her into his arms. The way they both pull way before Uriah and Gavin hug says they've been close for years. They exchange words and soon Their laughing carries through the room.

At that moment I'm glad I'd finished eating already because I couldn't stay there anymore. It took everything I had to make it home before I lost it. That laugh. It didn't belong to Lise. It never could. That laugh belonged to Tris.

Every memory I had of tris laughing plays through my head now. How could it be that these memories, the ones that had once been the greatest are the ones that hurt the most.

Tears come and I don't try to fight them. I let them spill until I'm emotionless and numb. I climb into bed and let sleep take me to a place where I'm not alone. I know it'll hurt when I wake up alone but I need to see her and it's the only way I can see her. The real her.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6: Lise POV

Dad let's go of Gavin. They'd hugged longer than gavin and I had.

"Woah man, we can't let Lise know you like me more than her,"Gavin says, jokingly. It felt so good to hear his voice. It'd been so long. I laughed in delight in being with my best friend again, and everyone followed suit.

We made it to our seats, Gavin and I on one side of the table, dad, zeke and Ezra on the other with shuana sitting at the head in her wheel chair.

"Eventually your going to have to tell me why you're here," Gavin said whispering in my ear. I nodded, great flu he hadn't brought the topic up to everyone. I can't wait to tell him everything and to hear all about what he's done since leaving.

"Where did Four go?" Ezra asks speaking above all the side conversations at the table. "He promised he'd tell me the story again?" He finished, obviously disappointed. I don't think Ezra knew four was my biological father, at least not yet. But for some reason I still worried. _What story would four have to tell Ezra? Why would he want to hear it again? Is it about my mom? _

"He was finished eating," zeke said in a tone that said it was no longer for discussion.

"Hey zeke, think we could take Lise to the Hancock building tonight," dad says, as he coming back from the wonderland he'd been in. Everyone's faces lit up with excitement, except for mine. I probably look about as confused as I feel right now, but nobody seems to notice.

"What exactly is this 'Hancock Building'?" I ask hoping someone would tell me. Everyone seems to make eye contact with each other, almost like they are having a conversation with their eyes. However nobody says anything to me.

"Oh don't worry,You'll love it little bird," Gavin is the first to speak up but he doesn't exactly answer my question anyway. His use of my nickname "little bird" seems to make everyone smile a bit. I'd gotten the nickname because of my moms tattoo. She had 4 ravens that flew across her collarbone towards her heart. Next to the one that was closest to her heart she had a smaller version. The little bird was me and the big bird had been my biological father. The nickname had fit me well considering I'd never been afraid of heights rather the opposite if found them beautiful and exhilarating.

For my 14th birthday my dad let me get my first tattoo. I'd gotten ravens on my collar bone just like my mother. However, unlike her, my relationship with my biological parents was extremely complicated, I had no siblings, I've never been in love and never had children. Instead I got 1 regular size bird, for Uriah, 1 smaller bird, for tris, and a little bird following tris to represent the baggage my biological father had become and his very small role in my life.

By the time I'd come back to reality, everyone had agreed on a time to meet at the train and Gavin had regretfully informed all of us that he couldn't go. Apparently the abnegation ambassador was coming and he needed to meet with him. _I guess that means Gavin is an ambassador as well._

* * *

We the building sand made our way to the elevator towards the back of the building. We piled into the elevator, Zeke pressed the button for the highest floor. The little 100 lighting in the dark room. We moved farther and farther from the ground until the door opened to a roof full of people. We all filed out everyone disappearing into the cloud leaving me standing alone in the clearing around the elevator.

I wander until I see dad and zeke. They motion for me to come towards them and the steel wire as thick around as my wrist. Someone is pulled back in a sling before the are sent flying through the sky. I_t's a zip line. _

Itdoesn't take long before I've crawled into the sling head first and face down. The tighten the sling first around my shoulders, then my midsection and lastly around my thighs. I feel myself sliding backwards before I'm let go and every thought cluttering my mind is lost with the wind.

I'm free and weightless. Flying through the sky at incredible speeds. I throw my arms to the side and close my eyes. The wind whips around my causing my eyes to fill with tears. I finally feel like everyone's always seen me. A little bird. Free. Independent. Fearless. My body buzzes, awake with adrenaline.

My speeds slow until eventually I stop. Looking down I see a large group of people locking arms beneath me. I wiggle forward and fall from my sling into a net of limbs. My hair seems to defy gravity as I fall. The ground comes closer and clearer as I near it. Warmth surges through me as I landed in the arms of strangers. Them accepting me as one if their own.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7:

I'm woken the next morning by the sound of forceful knocking. I take a moment to wipe the tears I'd shed in my sleep before rolling out of bed. On my way to the front door I run my fingers through my hair hoping to calm it.

Before I can fully open the door, Ezra has already found his way inside to my couch. I check the hallway to make sure nobody else was waiting to come in as well and shut the door.

"Dad says you have the day off today," he says enthusiastically," so you have plenty of time to keep that promise you forgot yesterday." He was right. I'd completely forgotten. In my rage and longing and self pity last night it'd slipped my mind completely. As much as I wanted to be alone, I wanted to keep my promise more. I love Ezra. He's the son I never got the chance to have.

"What story do you want to hear this time?"I asked. Maybe it won't be about tris. Maybe it won't hurt to tell it.

"I wanna hear about the rebel!"

_The Rebel. _It repeats in my head until I finally register it.

"Ah. Your favorite one. Don't you learn about this in school?" I ask hoping he would change his mind.

"Yes, but nobody tells it like you do," he says. He's right too. Nobody knew this all to famous _rebel_ like I did.

"Well many years ago, when I was much younger I trained the new dauntless initiates," I started the story the same way I had many times before. "When I was about 18 a new batch of initiates was coming in. A very special batch because in it there was one abnegation transfer, a rarity.

"She was a small and scrawny girl. Not very intimidating at first, but as time passed I don't think there was anyone left who she hadn't impressed someway. She turned out to be the bravest woman I'd ever met." I continue telling him how she almost single handedly defeated Janine Matthews, survived her own execution, and erased the memories of the beareu.

Although I know I've told this story thousands of times before, right now felt like the most important time I'd ever shared it.

"I know you know her name. When will I be old enough to know?" Ezra asked timidly. If wanted to share it but could never bring myself to do so. The rest of the world knew her as the rebel and her name has somehow become the last thing connecting me to her and those who knew her.

"Hold on. I'm not done," I said giving myself no time to change my mind before continuing. Ezra's mouth gapes open.

"I never got to see her body, I don't think any of us did, do I don't know why I believed it. Her death hit me harder than anyone. I'd regretted every lost chance if had to be with her."

"You loved her," he states plainly but his face shows all the shock in the world.

I don't ever reply just continue, "then one day I woke to find a note telling me I was needed in the infirmary. I'd taken my time getting there but when I did her best friend sat in the lobby crying. The last thing I remember before I collapsed was the words _'she's alive'._"

"That's all you're going to tell me isn't it?" Ezra lets out with a sigh.

I nod. "For now," I let out slowly. Someday I will tell him everything but for now that will have to do.

"I better go or I'll be late for school. Thanks four," Ezra said before he left. I didn't move for a few minutes, drowning in the silence of my now empty apartment.

I make my way to the bathroom and immediately regret it when I see the mirror broken and cracked. I'd done it last night after waking up from a nightmare of her.

I seem to become more of a coward. More broken. Lonelier. Weaker. Every day she's gone. It's been 16 years and I still can't find the man she'd once made me.

I can't be broken anymore. I can't let some little girl tear me apart. I should let her remind me of all the good things about tris. Also, if I'm ever going to find my tris, she may be the only way.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Lise POV

I've spent most of the day today wandering the compound by myself. Ezra left for school before I woke up this morning. Zeke, shuana, and Gavin all have to work and dad has been catching up with his old friends. I overheard the adults talking about four having the day off, so I've been secretly hoping if run into him sometime. It never happened.

I made my way to our table in the cafeteria. It's empty, figures. I sit, picking at my hamburger allowing my thoughts to wander. Tomorrow dad is taking me to see Hanna, his mother, for what may be the last time. She's been very sick for quite some time and the doctors are sure she won't be here much longer.

Ezra is the first to get here,smiling as he says, "hey Lise!" Four follows closely behind taking a seat directly across from me.

"Hey!" I said suddenly wanting to be alone again. My eyes find their way back to my un-eaten hamburger. I'd never been particularly fond of them but I'd always ate them anyway because they were dad's favorite.

A voice pulls me back to reality, although I wasn't aware I'd left. The two boys sit across from me eyes intent waiting for me to answer. They must have realized I wasn't listening because four repeats himself.

"So why do they call you Lise?" He asked and he seemed to be genuinely curious. He continues jokingly, "did you lie a lot when you were little? Or did your dad just really not want you to join candor?" I almost laughed, I'd heard jokes like these forever, but I've never heard one like that about candor.

Ezra knew why but I guess he sensed it was a topic I was going to talk about when I was ready. For that I was grateful. My given name, Elisabeth, was a very abnegation name and had become a special thing I'd only shared with the people I'd considered family. My family had also given me a nickname that sounded dauntless. I guess it was their was of honoring my parents. Both had their special abnegation names and the dauntless names everyone knew them by. At least that's what I guess the name 'four' is.

Suddenly protective of my name, I replied, "why do they call you four? Is that how many people you can kill at once?" I say keeping my appearance joking and light hearted. His demeanor changed.

"What makes you think I'll tell you?" He says. He's protective of his name too.

"Maybe it's because you're so approachable," I said suddenly furious. I take a moment remembering the saying Tris uses all the time."like a bed of nails"

With that I leave the two to do whatever they want. I need to clear my head and calm down. I find myself in the chasm listening to the water. It feels so nice to sit in such still and simple surroundings.

I hear footsteps behind me and turn to see Gavin taking a seat beside me.

"I think now is the time to tell me why you're really here."

"I wasn't trying to keep it a secret from you," I say keeping my eyes trained in the water.

"Then who were you bidding it from?"

"Four" I said trying to sound nonchalant. I knew I didn't satisfy his curiosity that was a trait of his erudite aptitude. "I'm really here to see him. It took some convincing but they finally let me meet my biological father."

His mouth hangs open and I give him time to get over the initial shock."I knew of seen his eyes before," he mutters under his breath. I can't help but laugh and it seems to make all my worries disappear. We sit, talking and laughing like nothing had happened, for what seems like hours.

"I hate to say it but I really have to go, Lise," he says standing up. I follow, quickly moving to my feet just in time for him to wrap me in a hug.

"You have no idea how much I missed you," he whispers, his breath tickling my neck. I pull away, our eyes locking with each other.

"This goes against all our promises," I state softly. It was true. We'd once promised we'd never tell each other what faction we were going to choose because we didn't want to affect each others choices. We'd shared everything, he'd even shared the results of his aptitude tests, but we'd never crossed that line. Until now.

"I'm not going to complain," a smile widening across his face. He pulls me in one last time, hugging me tightly before heading back up the path that leads out the chasm.

"Oh and Gavin," I say barely loud enough for him to hear, "I know the real reason you chose ambassador." He turns our eyes meet and he winks playfully and continues to walk away.

I sit again, listening. Letting the absence of sound calm my troubled mind. That was until the footsteps start again. When I turn to look, it's none other than the infamous four, leaning against the wall of the chasm.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Four POV

After dinner i find myself wandering into the chasm. It's become extremely hard to think clearly after Lise said the exact same thing that tris did all those years ago.

The deeper I get into the chasm the clearer it is to me that there is a couple down here. _Gavin and Lise_. He pulls from their hug heading up in the opposite direction.

Lise says something quietly. You could tell she didn't want anyone to hear, but I did. "Oh and Gavin, I know the real reason you chose to be ambassador"

Like pieces of a puzzle coming together everything makes sense. During Gavin's initiation, his worst fear was going to what I guess was his home and finding tons of people dead. I'd always felt like I'd known most of them. Two of them looked exactly like tris and sometimes I'd see Uriah or Christina but I'd always assumed that it was just my grief playing tricks on my mind.

You could tell the people in this fear had been dead for a while. His fear had been that everyone he cared about would die and he could not protect them. However one of the tris look alikes had always seemed to hit Gavin the hardest. _It's Lise that he was the most afraid of loosing. He's in love with Lise and she has no idea. He wanted to be an ambassador to see her no matter where she ended up._

I decided I was going to talk to Lise. I still have to know if there's any possibility she knew tris. I walked toward her and stopped leaning against the wall, not wanting to get to close. She looked back at me and our eyes meet. Her eyes are a beautiful color and very familiar but they were most certainly not Tris' eyes.

"I'm sorry for asking about your name," I said trying my best to use the polite abnegation voice I'd been raised with, but the vulnerability in my voice was obvious as well.

"I'm sorry for all the other things I said," he voice was calm and her composure controlled.

"Don't worry about it, you just reminded me of someone," I stopped myself for a minute. I'd wanted so badly to talk about true with someone. Id come close with Ezra but something always held me back, but right now was the right time."my wife actually, the day we first met she actually told me that I was 'approachable. Like a bed if nails'," her eyes met mine beaconing me to tell her more. I took a seat beside her watching the water.

"I'm sorry I had no idea. I didn't even know you were married."

"I suppose I'm not anymore but I guess that's why I'm here. This is where we had our first kiss. That night I'd shown her my fear landscape. She'd learned my real name, why they call my four, and saved me from my greatest fear. Afterwards she didn't look at me like a kicked puppy, she looked at me like I was the strongest man in the world. I've been out of my mind in love with her since then. About 16 years ago I'd planned to bring her down here after so got back from a trip to amity," I paused for a minute to look at her, she had all her attention on me, soaking up every word I said, her eyes seeing into the depths of my soul. In that moment she looked exactly like tris. I fought back the tears burning my eyes and continued talking.

"I'd been excited to talk to her. I was going to talk to her about starting a family. I would give anything to have a family with her right now. But she never made it on that trip. She left me that day actually, and I haven't seen or heard from her since and it kills me." I stop. I wanted to continue but the voices from above louder then normal reminded me we had a meeting tonight that I couldn't miss.

She looks to be shocked speachless.

"Lise, I have a meeting tonight that I'm going to be late for if I don't leave soon. Do you think you could meet me here in an hour and a half. Your the only person I could talk about with and it's been so long since I've been able to tell someone about her in the way I want to." I know it's a lot to ask but I can't help it.

She nodded and I took that as my que to leave.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10:Tris POV

My head pounded as I slowly stumbled into the bathroom. I turned on the shower and let the steam fill the bathroom slowly and faintly clearing my head. I'd never been one to truly enjoy alcohol but last night it drowned the memories of him as it drowned my blood stream. Although relieving then it's effects didn't seem to be worth it now.

I pulled myself into the water the warm droplets pounding my back. For the millionth time this week I am pulled back into my memories.

_Im awoken by sunlight pouring into my room. Tobias' arms hold my tightly against him. I turn to see his face made young and innocent by sleep. I pull my lips to his cheek feeling stubble against my lips. I'd come to find the small stubble to be extremely hot on him. _

_I carefully pull his arms off from around me and place them around a pillow hoping he is not awakened by my absence. I scurried into the bathroom hoping to get the hot water before it's all gone._

_I think nothing of the bathroom door creak as water slides down my body in the warm downfall. I close my eyes allowing the steam to envelope me reminding my of the perfection if been blessed with in my life lately. _

_I nearly fall when a pair of strong arms wrap around me. I tense before realizing they were the same arms I'd woken up being wrapped in. I relax into his touch. His lips make their way leaving soft kisses on my neck. _

_"Hi" I gasp. He only responds by trailing his lips to my collar bone slowly kissing each of the four birds. _

_"You're up early sleeping beauty," he mutters against my skin and I turn to face him. Self consciously my arms wrap protectively around my plain body as my breath catches in my throat looking at his perfect one._

_"You like what you see?" He says a smirk playing with his lips calling attention to my unconscious staring. I nod and bite my lip, turning my glare away from him. I'm struck with embarrassment realizing just how much better he could do then me._

_"Tris," he says gently._

_"Hmm," I say barley inaudible above the the steady stream of water around us. His rough hand cups my chin, pulling my gaze up until I have no choice but stare into a pair of piercing blue eyes. His eyes fully display the love he feels for me as he stares deeply into my eyes as well. His eyes then glance down at my body. I blush gripping my sides more fiercely. He try's to pry my arms from my side and the first time they don't budge. When he tries again he successfully frees myself of my own grasp._

_He wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me closer to him. _

_"You. Are. Beautiful." He says, passion in his voice. He emphasizes each word with a kiss, first on my forehead, then the tip of my nose then lastly my lips._

_"You are my everything," he gasps pulling me in for another kiss this one passionate and I can feel his pressed against me. For the first time, I believe that beyond a shadow of a doubt Tobias loves me. And I love him as well. _

* * *

As I made my way across the hallway, my hair left trails of little droplets all the way to Christina's front door where I now stood. I didn't bother knocking, I never have. The door is unlocked as it usually is when they are home. I must not have been loud enough coming in because Chris and Robert still lay on the couch, making out.

_Ew. _I turn and head straight for the kitchen and fill a glass of water in the sink. After finding my seat at the kitchen table, I realize the two have made their way to join me at the table. However they keep looking at eachother like it's the only think in the world. They are so in love you can feel it when you are around them. Sometimes it makes it hard to be around them because it hurts to see two people so in love because I've lost the only love I've ever known.

"What's wrong tris?" Robert asks his kind amity side obvious in his voice.

"Nothing is wrong. I just wanted to come help prepare for those kids," I said adding a smile to convince. I don't think it worked though.

"Tell me what's wrong," Christina said sternly. I'd _almost_ forgot she could tell when I was lying.

"I don't know. I guess maybe it's the fact that tomorrow's my 41st birthday and I'm nowhere near where I thought if be. I lost the love of my life knowing I wasn't his one and only. Then I've spent the last 16 years of my life running from him with a daughter exactly like him in every way. I've only gotten weaker over the years. I haven't left my room since the anniversary and my own daughter hasn't returned my calls in days." Tears threatened to spill as I spoke but they never did. I've cried so much lately there is nothing left to cry

Chris and Robert exchange nervous glances. "About Elisabeth..." Robert started but Christina finished," Uriah and her left after family dinner. Hanna is in bad shape. She's going to die very soon and so they wanted to be with her one last time."

Shock and longing pulse through my body. I kept it from showing through however. Hanna had become like a mother to me. She'd loved both me and Lise like her own and I couldn't let her go without talking to her.

I spent the rest of the day helping them prepare, Lise Hanna and Uriah constantly in the back of my mind. It's bazaar to think of be the one to help Chris and Robert get ready considering I completely unable to raise my own. At some point I got lost in the act of helping, just as I'd been raised and it was relieving.

It didn't last long though. Once I was alone again I couldn't hold myself back. I know where I need to be. I need to be with Hanna Uriah and Lise inside the city walls and by Tomorrow that is exactly where I'll be.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11: Four POV

When I wander into the chasm, Lise sits, still in the place I'd left her more then an hour. I'd be severely shocked if she'd moved at all.

"Have you moved since I left?" I ask taking a seat beside her, oddly comfortable in her presence. She shock her head and opened her mouth like she had something to say then stopped herself as if she thought better of it.

"You are sharing all of this with me and I think I should share something with you too," she said quietly after a couple minutes of silence. "My real name is Elisabeth, Lise only a nickname with no significant meaning other than my birth-mother wanted me to have a nickname."

I can't contain my curiosity. It was one of my biggest downfalls when I lived in abnegation. "Birth mother?" I said questioningly. She looks down observing the skin on her arms, a quiet, familiar laugh escaping her lips.

"Well obviously Uriah and I aren't blood related," she says light heartedly. A smile breaks out on my lips because she was right. There's no way any child of uriah's could be as pale as she was.

"When I was north my birth-mother was, well alone and one of the few things anyone will tell me about my biological father is that he wanted absolutely nothing to do with me"

"Why won't people tell you about your biological father?" She shrugs of my question. The way she did it told me she honestly didn't know either.

"It's like it's rehearsed sometimes too because everytime I ask I get one of the same four answers."

"What do they say?" I asked hoping I hadn't crossed any lines. The look in her eyes as she stares back at me is almost mischievous, something she'd obviously picked up from uri.

"The first thing I know is that my dad was some seriously wicked dauntless legend. I know that the only obvious physical characteristics I share with him are my eyes and my smile. I know he didn't want me. And lastly, I know that him and my birth-mother had a talent for tearing each other to pieces"

There's a comfortable silence between us as I think about what tris and I's kids would've said about us if we had been given the chance.

I am the first to break the silence,"ask me something."She seems confused, so continue less cautiously,"you answered my questions, now it's my turn."

She watched the water in the chasm whispering,"why did your wife leave you?" Just the question I'm afraid to answer.

"She thought I cheated on her," I said letting out a breath i didn't even realize had been caught in my throat. "I guess from her point of view I did," I continued.

"How?"

"She was supposed to go to amity that night, but she didn't. Instead she came home and found another woman in our home wearing my clothes." It hurt me to say these words. I could feel each one as a knife in my chest.

She audibly gasps, saying," you cheated on her?"

I shook my head unable to hide the guilt i feel. "I could never do that. That night an old friend of mine,Lauren, was attacked by a drunk man. I happened to walk past him trying to... Touch her. I guess my abnegation instincts kicked in then. I got her away from the man and took her to back to help her. She'd been covered in vomit and spilled alcohol so I let her barrow some of my clothes because my wife's were too small, then I offered her the guest bedroom because the events of the night had obviously terrified her."

I find there isn't anything else I can say, so I let her digest everything feeling the silence like a warm blanket wrapping around us. After what seems like an hour she leans close enough for me to feel her breath in my ear.

"You know four, Tris is still Madly in love with you. If you both were honest and excepted each others baggage, there's no way you couldn't get her back."

_Tris loves me. I'd do anything to have her back, no matter what baggage or secrets I just need my tris. I think she needs me too. _


	12. Chapter 12

**Warning: This is kind of a filler chapter I just needed to set some things up**

Chapter 12:Lise POV

When I woke up, I could hear voices in the other room. There were 4 of them whispering behind the door, but only 3 of them I'd known. Questions pulse through my brain as I pull myself to the bathroom, absentmindedly going through the motions of getting ready. When I look up I see I've pulled my hair into a tight abnegation bun at the name of my neck. I guess it only made sense that after talking to four I'd feel strangely close to my birth mother and consequently do my hair the way she'd done it when I was a child.

As I get close to the door leading to the living room the voices ring in clearly, slightly louder then they had been earlier.

"Marlene, you know I love you but before this goes anywhere there is something I need to tell you," my dad says. _Marlene? How could it be? _

I decide to enter the room now knowing all too well that I was exactly the ting he was wishing to share.

As I enter the room, I am immediately with 4 pairs of eyes. One of them confirming my last suspicions. There sitting across from my dad was someone I'd seen thousands of times before. Never in person though.

At home, my dad always had 2 pictures on his night stand. The first one was a picture of him dancing carelessly with the 9 year old version of me with tris Christina Robert Zeke and Shauna all around but barley visible through the happiness radiating from me and dad. The second one was the teenage version of my dad standing in what looks like candor, kissing the woman I am now looking at. His love. Marlene.

"This is my daughter," Uriah says. He's obviously nervous by the quiet way he is speaking. Marlene's face registers pain and disappointment and something else that reminds me too much of betrayal. She turns to Uriah her fist quickly making friends with his face. A crack echoes through the silent apartment. I can't stop watching her in amusement as she backs out of the room. Suddenly everything clicks I'm my head. She feels betrayed because she thinks Uriah was with someone else.

"Wait, Marlene! Let me explain please," I say leaping out the stillness I'd once been in and darting across the room catching her arm as she reached the door. She jerked her hand from my grasp and stepped into the hallway. In one swift move I instinctively kick her legs knocking her to the ground and pinning her there as if it was second nature.

"How'd you know my name?" She gasps.

"I recognized you from the picture on my dad's night stand." I am trying my best to mask my frustration with kindness knowing I'm not doing the best job.

Shock was written on every feature of her face. She was totally unaware the extent of dad's feelings for her.

"Now will you please give us a chance to explain before you break my dad's heart all over again." I sound kind and this time it's completely sincere. She looks around realizing she's pinned to the ground by a 15 year old girl, in the middle of the hallway. She nods. I hop off of her and offer her my hand to help her up, she refuses, and walks right past Uriah,who stands covered in blood and pride in his daughter, and straight into the living room.

Seeing dad, I know exactly what I need to do. I walk straight into the kitchen grabbing some napkins and 2 tea bags. As I wipe the blood from dad's face and make him sit in the recliner. I can feel all eyes on me as I pull the recliner all the way back. I placed the tea bags right where his nostrils open. I remember Robert, a former Amity, teaching me this the first time Gavin got in a fight at school. His nose was far more than broken and bled uncontrollably. Robert said it'd helped the blood stop, and oh boy was he right.

"You remind me of someone I used to know..." Marlene says, her voice trailing off as if asking me my name.

"Lise," I say plainly and smiling as I turn to face smile was kind, the kind of smile that put Tris in tears, as I continued speaking," and probably because you knew my biological parents"

Everyone watches Marlene as the clocks slowly turn in her head. "Tris," she whispered softly.

Uriah almost visually jumped trying to add,"and Four." Both their faces showed relief but Marlene had definitely not put all the pieces together. Certainly not an erudite.

"I'm adopted. Neither of them wanted me."

* * *

I was relieved to finally get everything worked out. The tensioned had stressed me out so much. As we made our way down to the cafeteria for breakfast, Dad and Marlene clung to each other in a way that made their love radiate off them.

As soon as I entered the room, Gavin, sensing my discomfort, grabbed my arm and started pulling me toward a group of people around his age. I'd seen them together before, so I assume they are friends, probably from initiation.

He introduced me to his friends one by one. There was one boy sitting on the other table named Amos, next to him was a girl I assumed to be his girlfriend, October and next to her was a girl named Genesis.

We say down next to Malachi and immediately following us 2 girls joined, sunny and jolene, one of which obviously upset that Gavin wouldn't sit with her.

"Let me guess dauntless-borns?" I asked jokingly, trying to cover up the fact I'd just admitted to analyzing them. My thoughts wander. My birth-mother had once been a transfer here and I wonder if she felt the same as I do right now: overwhelmed in a beautiful and mysterious way.

"If her aim with knives is anything like her aim with guns, the only person she couldn't beat in here is me," Gavin says. I can't back down from his challenge.

"Oh please, I could slay you at knife throwing. You'd just have to show me how first." I say confidently, hoping if said the right thing considering I hadn't been listening to the rest of the conversation.

"Is that a bet?" He asks tauntingly.

"A bet in which 2 days worth of dauntless cake is on the line."

He doesn't even stop to think about it before agreeing. All of his friends are working today and were unable to join us. However, something tells me they are going to want to hear all about it.

As we enter the training room, none other then the infamous Four stands in the back of the room punching away at a bag. Each time it makes contact, his fist leaves a large print in blood. He looks sadistic. Something set him off and whatever it was, he is not the man I met last night. This is the man who haunts my nightmares.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter dedicated to maggiescousin and Sol Spell Diggory**

Chapter 13: Four POV

I know something is going to happen today, maybe I'm just paranoid because I know that today is Tris' birthday. Whatever the reason,I can feel it in the way my hair stands on end and everything seems to be setting me off. I can hear it in the way people whisper as I walk by. I can see it in the way people stare at me or act like at any moment I'll tear them to pieces. However, the worst thing is the way people look at me as if trying to say sorry, like I'm a puppy they've just watched being kicked.

It isn't long until I find myself in the training room. My thoughts become clouded until the only ones that remain are the ones that propel my fists into a punching bag in perfect rhythmic pattern. I've even began to block out shooting pain that courses through my veins with every punch.

Pulling me into consciousness is the sound of a knife sticking to the center of the target. I'd been too far gone to realize that Gavin and Lise had found their way here and he was now teaching her to throw a knife. I only stop to watch for a couple of seconds but it was long enough to see her practice throwing an invisible knife before she threw it, the knife hitting centimeters from the center.

I feel like I have just blacked out because the next thing I know, the bag flies backwards, no longer bound in the air by chains. It hits the wall, filling the room with the sound of an exploding bomb. I'm a way it sounds exactly how it should because I've been a ticking time bomb since she left and I've finally exploded.

"Stop looking at me," I basically yelled. The tension was tangible and infuriating. With nothing left but the explosive flares of my temper, I hit the punching bag beside me. Rid blood sticks to the bag in a print identical to that of my fist. As I turned to look at the first bag I realize it too is covered in thousands prints of my fist in drying crimson blood. Fear paralyzed me. _What have I become? I am a monster far worse then that of Eric or even marcus_.

"There you are!"a voice rings through the silent room. No. Stop Tobias. You are just hurting yourself. She's gone. As I turn to look my doubts slip from my mind. Across the room, wrapping Lise and Gavin in a hug, is Tris. The only woman I've ever loved. My let her name out in a gasp, the word so sweet against my lips after such a long absence.

Her eyes are pained as she pulls away from the kids to look at me.

"Four."

My skin crawls in the way she spits out my name like it is venom in her mouth. I watch as she quickly backs out of the room, her grace momentarily lost in this moment of sheer unpleasant reunion.

"Go put yourself together. She will never take you back if you look like a murderer. I'm going to go talk to her," Lise said. I feel as if I've just been shredded on the inside, as she hits every sensitive spot and deepest fear. However that was nothing compared to the word she called tris as she ran after her, taking every last morsel of strength left in me.

"Mom"


End file.
